Final thoughts/highlights from Midwinter 2013

Midwinter 2013 ended today.  It was a great time.  You can see my reflections from earlier in the week here.

As I share these final thoughts, I need to make it clear that I’ve probably had a different experience than many others because I was in a class all week learning about the Evangelical Covenant Church.

From what I’ve heard, the conference itself was quite encouraging.

Anyhow, here are some final thoughts/highlights from my time:

1) Meeting some “Living Legends” of the ECC was a Real Highlight - On Wednesday night, our class had a chance to visit a retirement community from the Evangelical Covenant Church, and we had the opportunity to hear from men and women in their 70s-90s who had served in vocational ministry in various places around the world ranging from San Diego to Ecuador.  Collectively, there was over 500 years of vocational ministry experience amongst this distinguished yet anonymous group (btw, they didn’t call themselves Living Legends – we did).

Some were church planters, some missionaries, a professor, and also the wife of an ECC missionary who was martyred in the Congo.

It was an EXTRAORDINARY time.

Some notable quotes:

“Anybody can count the seeds in an apple, but nobody can count the apples in a seed”

“You know you have worked on a sermon when the sermon has worked on you.”

“God is no respecter of denominations when we stand before him.”

I could have sat at their feet all day long to hear their stories and glean their wisdom.

2)  The Culture of the Evangelical Covenant Church is One that Really Attracts Me - The culture of the denomination is hard to describe, but after a week of hanging with Covenant folks, I think I have a clearer sense of why people say that “Covenant is caught, not taught.”

One can read all about the Covenant and learn of its immigrant history and humble beginnings, its emphasis on being mission friends rather than parsing theological minutiae, and its heart for the whole gospel for the whole world.

But here are some things in the culture of the denomination that I “caught” at Midwinter.

- Humility – It’s always hard to say something self-complimentary about humility, but yeah, the Covenant, especially its leaders, are really humble people.

In our class, we had some big-wigs come to our class, people I have no business hanging with, and they each came and presented with such humility, grace, and hospitality.

These people were kind, gentle, self-deprecating – it was awesome.  Each session we as a class had a chance to come around these folks and pray for them.

And here’s when I “caught” it.

In our classroom of about 40-ish students, It seemed like we had the most AV problems I’ve encountered since 1995 (this is a joke but you get my drift).

But all the presenters, including the president, just flowed with it and didn’t get frustrated or perturbed in the slightest bit.  He even laughed it off!

At one point, one of our regional superintendents went up to the powerpoint and started manually hitting the space bar to help out one of the other instructors as he was teaching.

No complaining, no “I’m better than this”, no “what’s the problem”.

It was awesome.

I couldn’t have “caught” this culture of mutual service and humility without being there.

- Ministry to the Under-resourced - At the beginning of our class, we all had a chance to go around the room and share about our ministry contexts around the country.

What really stood out to me was how many churches talked about their ministries to the under-resourced, despite the varying size of their city or church.

I was really struck by this, and I could see how mission really is a common thread in ECC churches/ministries.

- Race, Compassion, & Justice – I must admit, I was a bit shocked at how many white people there were at Midwinter.  But then I remembered it was founded by Swedish immigrants!

But, I could see how intentional the ECC is in empowering people of color and women on stage and in positions of influence.

In one of the main evening sessions of the conference (I was able to attend evening sessions), the topic – from sermon to songs to prayer – was on compassion and understanding toward immigrants.

Uh, how many denominations are devoting an entire plenary on that subject?

Very cool.

- Generous Orthodoxy - Throughout the week I heard people quote Desert Fathers, Greg Boyd, Soong-Chan Rah, Rob Bell, & John Piper.

I don’t think all these people will be dining together soon, but at the Covenant table, we’re all welcome as we discuss “Where’s it written?”

3)  I Really Love our East Coast Conference – I absolutely LOVE hanging with these cats.  I especially appreciate the leadership of Howard Burgoyne, Jason Condon, and Kreig Gammelgard, because they embody so much of the above.

Plus, they know how to throw a great dinner party.  Those tacos… wow!

4)  I Love What We’re Doing at Hope Church NYC, and I Love Working Alongside Craig Okpala - I’m so energized by what’s happening at Hope, and I’m so excited for its future.  It felt really meaningful to be so new to the denomination and yet to hold to much of what the Covenant is about.

And yeah, I’m just so, so excited about all that’s to come for us as we seek to extend hope in Astoria and beyond.

I also got to spend the week with Craig Okpala, and that’s been so much fun.  We shared, laughed, ate lots of Mexican Food, and even had all-you-can eat Korean BBQ in Los Angeles.  So much fun.

I’m so honored to be planting this church with Craig, and I’m thankful to be working with someone I greatly respect but also someone I’m privileged to call my friend.

I think what’s been most fulfilling about church planting in general has been being able to do life and mission with my friends, and that seems wholly appropriate for us as we’re part of a movement that started out with the title “Mission Friends”.

Mission Friends.

I like that.

I like that very much.

Thoughts on Midwinter 2013

I know, I haven’t been much of a blogger lately, but there are lots of things I haven’t done lately since I 1) celebrated the birth of our son, and 2) helped plant a church with some awesome people.  I shall blog about the things I’ve given up sometime.

But while I’m in California this week for a conference, I’m actually afforded a bit of time to reflect AND write about things, and so this brings you today’s post about Midwinter 2013, an annual conference that our denomination, the Evangelical Covenant Church hosts every year.

Hope Church NYC belongs to this family of churches, and the ECC has been a wonderful support for us through our first few months of existence.

This week, I’m learning more and more about the denomination, and it’s been a sweet time to hearing of the history and culture of the ECC on a broader scale (Prior to this, I only had a chance to interact with folks from our East Coast Conference).

A few things have stood out thus far in the conference (the conference lasts until Friday – I’ve been here Mon-Tue thus far), and I thought I’d share them here.

1) This is more like a family reunion than a conference – I’ve seen more hugs and hang-outs here than any other conference I’ve been to.  This is a denominational gathering that the people here seem to LOVE to attend, mostly to see friends in ministry.  All the training, workshops, plenaries seem to be added bonuses to the main prize – reconnecting with God through friendships made amongst “mission friends”.

2)  This is the most intergenerational and ethnically diverse conference I’ve been to – Most conferences usually have a specific type of audience, understandably, whether it’s a conference that tends to have a younger crowd or an older crowd or a megachurch-y crowd or a minority crowd.

There are so many people at this conference SIMILAR to me and DISSIMILAR to me.  It’s a bit jarring and comforting at the same time.

3)  I feel at home – This probably deserves another blog post, but there’s so much about the heartbeat of this denomination that resonates with me.  The churches and church leaders I’ve encountered here are SO different than me and our context at Hope, and yet, there’s a similar thread and heartbeat that weaves us together.  Amazing.

4)  Better together – I believe one of the Covenant World Missions folks used this phrase, and it’s such a delightful phrase to describe who we are and what we can be when we work together.

This spirit of relationship and unity really permeates the culture – or at least amongst the folks I’ve encountered thus far.

Better together.

That sounds familiar, something akin to “the world will know that you are my disciples by your love.”

———-

I’ll share more as the conference wraps up on Friday, but yeah, it’s been a really sweet time for me to immerse myself in this family of churches and ministries.

Drinking the Kool-Aid…

Christmas Lament

I know Christmas has passed and a new year has dawned, but this Christmas Lament from a good friend left me speechless in wonder, grief, and hope, especially in light of all that happened in Connecticut a few weeks ago.

So here it is – a Christmas Lament.

To the baby Jesus:
You, who gave yourself in
soft flesh,
helpless and grateful
to live in that singularly
limited and tender and
fragile and
infinite prism we call
a human life,
to suffer our pains and
rejoice in our rejoicings,
to eat and drink and sleep
and grow weary,
to give of yourself freely
to the very end,
surrendering your living nerves and
brittle limbs to the caustic lash,
the breaking hammer,
the slow choke,
to finally expire
blessing your torturers
and then
to rise again,
banishing death and
offering hope -

To you, Blessed One,
I bring tribute,
my hands full of my
shattered wealth, nothing left but
tears and words and
questions my tongue can't pronounce, and
a list
of twenty-eight names,
twenty of them the bubbling,
musical names of children,
babies like yourself,
tender and soft and broken and
infinite,
leaking through my fingers
like sand, lost.

I bring you
the absence of laughter
on the playground,
and the pencil stubs
and fractured crayons
abandoned on the floor.

I bring you the
phantom hugs and
slippery kisses
missing now from the days.

I bring you the
little bodies, who touched
and tasted and
squabbled and reached and
stumbled and now
lie still.

I bring you hopes
and dreams, severed from
their timeline, tied and
floating freely like a
bouquet of bright helium balloons.

I bring you the parents,
spirits riven,
itching to peel their skin off,
to be someone else,
something else,
anything else.

I bring you the inarticulate
keening of a people
heartbroken and confused,
which cannot rise even
from the dust
so weighted is it with grief
choking on its own sorrow.
There are no words to explain this.
There is no prayer to pray.
I have nothing of value to give and so
I bring this
worthless poem
barbed with anger, mangled,
parched, unyielding and
unlovely,
whispered for all who suffer and die
and are silenced too soon.
I come, a ragged and 
impoverished mourner, and
lay these shards at your feet.

How Good It Is To Center Down

How good it is to center down!

To sit quietly and see one’s self pass by!

The streets of our minds seethe with endless traffic;

Our spirits resound with clashings, with noisy silences,

While something deep within hungers and thirsts for the still moment and the resting lull.

With full intensity we seek, ere the quiet passes, a fresh sense of order in our living;

A direction, a strong purpose that will structure our confusion and bring meaning in our chaos.

We look at ourselves in this waiting moment- the kind of people we are.

The questions persist: what are we doing with our lives? what are the motives that order our days?

What is the end of our doings? Where are we trying to go?

Where do we put the emphasis and where are our values focused?

For what end do we make sacrifices? Where is my treasure and what do I love most in life?

What do I hate most in life and to what am I true?

Over and over questions beat in upon the waiting moment.

As we listen, floating up through all the jangling echoes of our turbulence, there is a sound of another kind-

A deeper note which only the stillness of the heart makes clear.

It moves directly to the core of our being. Our questions are answered.

Our spirits refreshed, and we move back into the traffic of our daily round.

With the peace of the Eternal in our step.

How good it is to center down!

 

- Howard Thurman

Hope Church NYC Launches This Sunday, September 23rd

It’s hard to believe that September 23rd is finally here.  After months of wrestling with God about what our next steps were, Tina and I came to the conclusion that God was calling us to stay in NYC and plant a church in Astoria, NY.

Less than one year later, Hope Church NYC officially launches.  I am so humbled and grateful as this church planting project is born.

Solideogloria.

As we head into this Sunday, I wanted to recognize some folks whom God has graciously allowed to have a hand in planting Hope.

1)  Tina and Our Son David – This has been an unbelievable season for our family, and one that has taken precedence over what’s happened at Hope.  David has been such a gift, and Tina has been the best mom and wife I could have ever asked for.

My wife and son have been a gift from God.

With all the stresses of a newborn and a new church, Tina has been a steady and faithful rock throughout the process, even putting up with my shenanigans with good-spirited aplomb.

And David has been a true champ.  I love these two!

2) Launch Team -  What makes a church is the people, and Hope is full of some incredible people.  I can’t thank these folks enough for their commitment, their volunteering, and most of all, their presence!

There have been some funny, “that’s church planting” moments for sure, but I’m so grateful for the willingness to go with the flow as we’ve had so many stops/starts & twists/turns.

This community has also shown me so much grace through my own mistakes – many of which have been painful but necessary to see.

Launch team and new regular attenders – thanks so much for being part of what’s happening at Hope!

PS Special shout-out to our other pastoral staffers – Craig Okpala and Joe Longarino.  Studs.

3) The Evangelical Covenant Church - It’s been such a joy to be part of a larger movement, and the Evangelical Covenant Church has been super supportive and encouraging throughout.  Jason Condon, the Director of Church Planting for the East Coast Conference of the ECC, has been so helpful and insightful in this process, and learning alongside other church planters in NYC, NJ, and New England has challenged and encouraged me in so many ways.

We’re so lucky to be part of this family of churches!

4) Family and Friends who have Supported Hope - So many friends and family have supported this church plant with their prayers and their financial support, and it’s been so humbling to hear stories of people fasting and praying on our behalf, while others have given sacrificially so that we could launch.

Seriously humbled by all these folks who are literally all around the world. Thank you so much for your friendship, mentorship, and generosity.

And a very special thanks to the Hyun and Park families.  Tina and I are so, so grateful for you and your support.

5) New Life Fellowship - I’m so grateful for all the friendships I’ve made at New Life over the years, and the incredible people I’ve learned so much from. Obviously Pete and Geri Scazzero have had a significant part in that journey, and I’m so, so grateful for all they have deposited in me over the years.

I wouldn’t be the person I am today without New Life, and Hope wouldn’t be the kind of church that it is without New Life.

6) Other churches in NYC - There have been so many pastors who have voiced their support of what we’re doing, and to know we stand side-by-side with so many churches is an amazing feeling.

There’s something stirring in NYC…

McDonalds, Church Planting, and Open Hands

Back when I was in grade school, I remember having a conversation with a mentor I greatly admired about how delicious double cheeseburgers at McDonalds are.

I love(d) double cheeseburgers, mostly because I love cheese and meat, so any time I get double cheese and double meat, I’m a happy person.  The double cheeseburger then, is a stroke of genius.

So you can imagine how shocked I was when Edwin, my mentor who was in college at the time, told me, “I really don’t eat McDonalds.  One day you’ll find that you really won’t like McDonalds either.”

WHAT??!!?

That sounded like heresy to me.

Why was it heresy?

Because back then, I wanted to eat McDonalds every day, every meal.

I couldn’t possibly fathom a life without wanting McDonalds every day, every meal.

———————

Fast forward 20 years or so, and I can’t remember the last time I had McDonalds (Taco Bell is a different story).  Was it a year ago?  Two years ago?

I don’t remember.

Somehow, Edwin’s predictions rang true.  My appetite for McDonalds is gone.  And really, my appetite for most fast food is gone.

What was once unconscionable for me is now reality.

——————–

There was a time in my life when I thought that church planting was never in my future.

I just thought church planting was too… out there.

It took too much guts, too much faith, too much craziness.

And yet, here I am.

We’re on the cusp of our public launch of Hope Church NYC on September 23rd, 2012.

Never in my wildest dreams…

——————-

There’s a short book by Henri Nouwen that I read a few years ago called With Open Hands.  It’s a quick read that’s full of long wisdom.

In it, Nouwen talks about praying with open hands versus praying with clenched fists.

Can you picture it?  Open hands vs. Clenched fists.

The image alone is worth the cost of the book, in my opinion.

Am I holding tightly to my ways, my plans, my ambitions?

Or am I holding everything – even the good things that I’m supposed to care deeply about – with Open Hands?

Open Hands vs. Clenched Fists.  You don’t even need to read the book, I imagine, because I think the metaphor says it all.

————

In many respects, life is so full of curveballs and circumstances outside of our control.

And even things we can control – our wants and preferences for instance – are subject to changing whims and seasons.

I suspect we’d all be a little bit better off if we learned the art of praying – and living – with Open Hands.

Open to the ways God is working in us and through us, molding us and shaping us into what He’s intended all along.

And somehow, we end up in a place that we never thought possible, not even in our wildest dreams.

Whether with McDonalds or Church Planting, I never thought this is where I’d be.

But wow, it’s pretty amazing what God can do.

 

Jeremy Lin, Race, and Proving Oneself

I posted a few days ago that I preferred for Jeremy Lin to play on the Rockets.

With that said, I was shocked to see the Knicks decline to match the offer.

I think what’s been so shocking to me is the recent analysis from some Knicks fans and other pundits (Stephen A Smith and Frank Isola come to mind) who have dismissed Lin’s ability, competitive spirit, and motivation (money).

Doubting Lin’s longevity, I can understand.

Doubting Lin’s consistency over 82 games and playoffs, I can understand.

But please don’t tell me the kid can’t play (can’t go left, questionable jumper, turnover prone, etc), lacks heart, and is driven by money. 

It’s baffling to me when people ignore the data.  Lin played well last year.  He had one bad game against the Heat, and consider it was only one bad game with every team gunning for him.

The data shows that Lin is a better player than Raymond Felton and Jason Kidd right now.

Listen, even I was a doubter of Lin.  Coming into the league, I thought at best he would be a solid backup for the right team.  I likened his game to Kyle Lowry (former point guard of the Rockets, ironically enough) when he first came into the NBA.  I would have been thrilled if Lin just got regular minutes on a team.

But this past year, Lin continued to prove me wrong.  He proved everybody wrong.  Time and again, Lin showed he’s a high caliber player in the NBA, capable of being elite and even carrying a team at times as the lead guard.

For 26 games, Lin was a terrific rookie (practically speaking) point guard last year.

Phil Taylor ‏@SI_PhilTaylor

We call some guys can’t-miss after 25 college gms. But 25 starts vs NBA comp. proves nothing? Y consider ‪#Lin‬ fraudulent, not promising?

Of course, I needed to confirm whether Lin’s play was all hype with no substance. So what did I do?  I looked at the data.

And the data is that Lin really did play well and elevate the performance of his team and teammates.

When it comes to money, Lin wasn’t the one who went fishing for more money from the Rockets – it was the Rockets who pursued Lin with a bigger deal.  To suggest that Lin was devious in upping the salary is silly considering it was the Knicks who publicly laid out their cards too early, thereby giving a chance for the Rockets to up their offer even further.

I did not expect such a strong smear campaign to come from “reliable Knicks sources”.

————

As an Asian-American, I’ll admit that the criticism toward Lin has stung a bit more.

As odd as this may sound, the Lin bashing felt personal, as if people were pushing around my kid brother.

Even though I wanted Lin to go to the Rockets, I’m actually disappointed at the Knicks and some of the media.

I’m mad enough that I was tempted to write a blog post in comic sans font claiming that Jeremy Lin would win a championship before the Knicks do.

Alas, I don’t know how to switch to comic sans on this blog.

It’s hard for me to believe that race isn’t involved in the critique of Lin’s game or his motives, especially when people ignore the data or choose to believe unnamed sources after Jeremy himself has come out and described the free agency process for himself.

So far, no Knicks source has come forward to claim the truth about how the negotiations went down.

So the smear campaign has begun.

————–

Whether it’s true or not that Lin’s game and motives have been dismissed because of his race, I realize this is the burden of being a minority in this country – the haunting suspicion that a slight or critique is due to one’s race.

The African-American community certainly feels this more acutely when there are slights (which many of us are so unaware of), but I think it’s also common for any minority.

It’s hard NOT to be sensitive and reactive to perceived slights.

But what’s harder, perhaps, is to receive those slights, push them away with firm yet gracious hands, and then go gang busters in proving the naysayers wrong.

At the end of the day, that’s probably the best that we can do when we are slighted, though.

We can either get too angry or get too soft, but somewhere in the middle is the way of redemption, the way of the cross and resurrection.

And so we absorb the criticism, maintain our identity as one whose Center is true, share our perspective in non-reactive ways, and then prove naysayers wrong with furious truth and love.

This is how redemption comes, I believe.

Furious truth and love… … in this case, on the basketball court.

Jeremy, I’m still rooting for you as hard as ever.